Off The Meter with Jimmy Failla

In our final broadcast before a family trip to the porn capitol of the world, societal analyst Travis James stopped by to divulge his theories on vaccinations leading to higher rates of autism. He also got into the newest evidence in the George Zimmerman trial. The show began with a tutorial for the left on what constitutes "intolerance." Now that everyone hates us, we'll see ya next week.

Helen Hong, star of The TV Guide Channel and self proclaimed "California 5" stopped by to discuss the LA dating scene as well as the John Travolta dating scene. A trip to the NY Tow Marshall had the whole show in an uproar and a discussion of the world's dumbest murder victims had our sensors working overtime as well.

In this episode we got into a new Colombian Drug that will serve as both the coolest drug ever AND the reason the world will end in 20 minutes. We continued to honor the troops by conducting our second sit down with Deron & Matt Steinke, War Heroes home from Afghanistan. We also got into the annual list of baby names and proved that people having girls try a lot harder.

Here's the full interview with war hero Deron Steinke, and his incredibly brave brother Matt. Some of you know them as my brothers in law, others probably know them from their multiple appearances on Dateline. Special thanks to Dean Imperial for co-piloting this one.

Dean Imperial joined us to welcome home my brother in law Deron Steinke from Afghanistan. There was also a stirring tribute to his brother Matt, who was brave enough to drive him to the airport. A new study revealed that Orlando Florida is the most porn addicted city in the country. We explained why.

An angry Ray Ellin revived the "Black Israelites" weighed in on the latest lawsuit facing John Travolta. President Obama pulled a Mitt Romney on Gay Marriage to the delight of many well heeled donors and we pissed off half the population in attempting to explain why he did it.

Reese Waters helped us make sense of the latest lawsuit facing John Travolta. He also explained the complications of taping Letterman with your second string offense seated in the audience. There was even some NFL talk, specifically, what Peyton Manning and Jim Carrey's first wife have in common. Ken Wood had the news on George Zimmerman, Mitt Romney, and morbidly obese Americans.

Katie Goodman joined us to talk about the "Too Fat To Fly" lawsuit being thrown at Southwest Airlines by an irate Wendy's enthusiast. Somehow she managed to harangue Rick Santorum along the way. We also go into alternative promotions to fill Obama's campaign events. Charles Barkley weighed in on the Race for the White House and it wasn't pretty.

Dean Imperial joined us to expose the fraud that is "The Ugly App". We also got into Octomom's pornographic offerings as well as Al Qaeda's. Frequent Fox News Contributor Jim Mendrinos stopped by to promote his new play "In Her Wake" and read his fellow Republicans their truth in a way that will probably get him fired.

Kirk Smith returned from Dallas to partake in a very uplifting episode of the show. Suicides, tanorexia, and the futility of the NY Knicks all had their day in the "sun" on this one.

Eric Reynolds braved a flat tire, the highway of death, and the May Day Mob to discuss the killing of Bin Laden. We also explained why current terrorists lack the fundamental understanding of our country needed to spread their message.

In this episode we broke down exactly why Jon Lovitz is mad at the President and explained why it's Lovitz' fault. We also assessed the President's performance at the White House Correspondent's dinner and attempted to fix the Occupy movement.

Travis James stopped by to explain why Ron Paul is the only candidate that has the best interests of the black community in mind. He also offered "Proof" that Obama's birth certificate is fake, and proof that he and his friend Louis have definitely done a few drugs in their day. We also discussed a bride who planned a wedding that would make Bernie Madoff proud and the reason Obama wishes he had Palin and not Biden. Please forward all lawsuits to our legal team, Holstein & Stoltz LLC.

Alyse Kenny stopped by on behalf of the Michael J. Fox foundation to give us some "Chicken Soup for the Listener's Soul". A columnist in the NY Daily News tried playing the race card and failed horribly and Brian Cashman of the New York Yankees tried conducting two affairs, a police probe, and a baseball trade SIMULTANEOUSLY, only to fail horribly as well.

In this episode we cut to the core of what really makes Obama such a great campaigner and we also explained why some people JUSTIFIABLY hate him. Having said that, he might have clinched reelection last night. Ray Ellin took time out from hanging in Aruba to explain why he shouldn't have taken time out from hanging in Aruba. He also gave us a real insider account of why comedian Randy Kagan was attacked at the Hollywood Improv and he told us why a host should never pick on a Russian patron @ The Comedy Cellar.

Truck Hudson, explained his recent appearance on Boardwalk Empire and helped us break down a fight at the Hollywood Improv between a comic and an audience member. We also got into the "Cannonball Run" that the New Jersey State Troopers sponsored for ex NY Giant Brandon Jacobs.

Jaime Nelson, Book Publicist to the stars, stopped by to put her job on the line by dishing on a clientele that includes Oscar Winners and music stars. A group of people looking to help the homeless spent more time exposing the fact that they don't UNDERSTAND the homeless and invoking our ire in the process. As Mondays go, this was one of them.

Dean Imperial and Krystyna Hutchinson wrapped up the week by honoring the secret service with an episode of "Blame That Tune" dedicated to the best strip club disaster songs. The New York Board of Health released a new list of restaurant closures that explain how Jared got so skinny by eating Subway. Rats on Cocaine and diversity issues with the show "Girls" guest starred.

Harrison Greenbaum stopped by on his way to Headline Carolines so we could talk sexting the wrong person and screwing the RIGHT robot. The Museum of Racism opened up in Michigan and we had as hard a time talking about it as you did reading about it. The first presidential tracking poll offered proof that we need the election to be held tomorrow for the sake of everyone's sanity.

Ted Nugent unveiled his strategy for surviving another Obama presidency and much to our delight, no one in the media used the word "shocking". Comedic Powerhouse Kirk Smith stopped by to talk about autism awareness month and the joys of opening for an Elvis impersonator. Dick Clark died at the age of 82 and in our attempt to discuss it we nearly lost our jobs.

Bus drivers armed with taser guns and CIA agents armed with hookers took centerstage on this fun for the whole family hour of radio bliss. GOP Strategist Dave Finkelstein weighed in on the Colombian hooker scandal and comedian Tyler Gildin weighed in on the You Tube Revenue sharing scandal surrounding his meteoric rise to fame after doing a Jay Z parody.

Masturbating cops, sinking ships, and the best candy to be eating during a shooting were all on display in this ground breaking episode of the show. Lemon twinkie enthusiast Dean Imperial dropped in for a musical tribute to the Titanic in an all new installment of blame that tune.

Jim Mendrinos attempted to fill the enormous intellectual shoes of Mike Tyson, who decided to go all Farrakhan on George Zimmerman. We also got into Axl Rose's delusions of owning a time machine and exchanged some theories on the GOP Race that would get us gunned down @ Fox News. To be fair, MSNBC staffers wouldn't like us much either. Jim's new play "In Her Wake" is @ the Provincetown Playhouse on the Wharf in NYC in May. Check it out!

Here's my 8pm set Friday March 30 @ City Steam in Hartford, CT

Newt Gingrich is broke but Pat Dixon stopped by to discuss a group of people even more likely to spit shine your windshield during your evening commute. The impending arrest of George Zimmerman lead to a frank discussion about the real upside of an end to this fiasco. Fake stats about teen pregnancies guest starred.

Chloe Hilliard, Stand Up Comic and Inspirational Speaker, dished on the real reason you need to lose weight as well as the truth behind George Zimmerman's Pay Pal account. Rick Santorum's campaign went the way of Herman Cain, but sadly, without the sexscapades.

Eric Reynolds, 20 year NYPD Vet and solver of the Jon Benet Ramsey case, stopped by to extol on the virtues of all the racial tension in the country right now. We also learned what constitutes A "NON HATE" Crime as well as how to employ "The Quote Rule" more effectively.

Here's Krystyna Hutchinson, Star Comic and Strip Club aficionado, talking Kardashian Psychology, Tyler Perry, and Amish Easter. FALSE CLAIMS of racial profiling also had a huge role as well as Mitt Romney's political ineptitude. We even through in a Good Friday edition of "Strip Club or Daycare".
Happy Easter and Happy Passover.

Ray Ellin took time out from launching his multimedia empire to talk about flying cars and REALLY bad roommates. A waitress in Minnesota received a twelve thousand dollar tip and turned it in to authorities despite our protests. The NY Mets began the season in shocking fashion.

Comedian Kirk Smith weighed in on the autism epidemic from an extremely informed vantage point. He also gave us some insight into how Paul McCartney socializes in Central Park. The Republican nominating process has ended, but no one told bothered to tell Rick Santorum and Newt Gingrich so we decided to lend a hand. We also searched for the perfect running mate for Mitt Romney with "imperfection" being the key attribute for all potential suitors. Kirk's Autism Awareness Blog is www.stoppingpuncheswithmyface.com and we consider it a "MUST READ"

Newly Wed Comedian Matt Baetz stopped by to talk about Ambulance Taxis, Facebook for terrorists, and legends of Tecmo Bowl. The Bloomberg administration came under fire yet again, this time for it's shameless attempt to raise money by literally throwing sick people to the curb.

Societal Analyst Dean Imperial stopped by let everyone in on the problem with Toure' and Keith Olbermann. He also extolled on the virtues of flying with an insane pilot working on Al Gore's TV Network. We even got into the fact that The Piers Morgan interview with Toure gave a lot of people on the left the perfect opportunity to make asses of themselves.

Robert Zimmerman, father of George Zimmerman, aka "America's Sweetheart", gave an exclusive interview about the Trayvon Martin shooting and we explained why it was a horrible move. We also explained why ABC news has created a whole knew brand of sensationalism. Hollywood Insider Jonathan Randall joined us to bring the superficiality back to our show, lest people start taking this seriously.

Katie Goodman came by to talk pilot meltdowns, campaign meltdowns, and George Zimmerman defenders. She also talked a lot of people out of having kids and shed some light on what it's like to marry the cover of a romance novel. Spike Lee refused to call our show and apologize yet again.

GOP Strategist Dave Finkelstein stopped by to defend George Zimmerman's right to due process and actually won us over on one issue: Spike Lee. The show began with the ultimate low point for the Gingrich campaign and middled on witness testimony in the tragic Florida shooting.

Ray Ellin stopped by to help figure out the REAL REASON George Zimmerman shot his gun and the REAL REASON people are watching "The Hunger Games". We also got into Rick Santorum's verbal smack down in Wisconsin and Tim Tebow's big press conference.

In this fun for the whole family edition of the show we focused on the people in our society that are behaving the worst: Geraldo Rivera and your cell phone provider. There was even a Pro-Tim Tebow piece related to the fat guys who populate sports talk radio. Happy Friday.

Mike Edison, author, inventor, and pornographer, stopped by to discuss the problem with the Santorum Campaign as well as the problems with MSNBC. Geraldo Rivera made the dopiest comment of the year on radio, leading to a discussion that will probably get us fired.

Eric Reynolds, atheist cop, stopped by to discuss synthetic weed and racist police departments on the very day the Jets acquired the Lord's son, Tim Tebow. Mitt Romney's campaign spokesperson ADMITTED that he'll say anything to get elected much to our delight as well as the Santorum campaign's as well.

Alyse Kenny, WILDLY SUCCESSFUL show producer and on the spot political pundit, stopped by to promote a sold out show and to get subjected to some gotcha journalism. The comic on the rise also revealed her secret service code name and weighed in on why Rick Santorum's codename is proof that he isn't anti-gay after all. Employers now want your Facebook Password during interviews and we explained why it's all our fault.

Reformed Whores Marie Cecile Anderson and Katy Frame stopped by to perform their new smash hits "Slut" and "Birth Control". They also weighed in with some theories on why "Kony 2012" Director Jason Russell has transitioned from exposing Kony to exposing himself. There was also a listening party/debut of "First Love Band"s new Rick Santorum anthem entitled "Game On".

Dean Imperial joined us to discuss the one maneuver from Rick Santorum that PROVES he doesn't want to win the nomination. We also took a friendly minute to wish Ass Cancer on a very prominent member of NY Society. The U.S. Leaving Afghanistan and Newt Gingrich not leaving the race also had their moment in the sun. Homeless wifi and a tale of spending a night in a Manhattan police precinct guest starred.

Mitt Romney loves Newt Gingrich and we offered proof in this show. We were also joined in studio by comedian Jordon Ferber to discuss Child Lottery winners and the resignation of Knicks coach Mike D'Antoni. There was also talk about last night's racist joke infused drinking binge that will probably get us fired.

Helen Hong took time out from talking about "The Flying Nunn" to have a frank discussion about using the homeless as wifi hotspots. Along the way we talked about bogus drug side effects and reasons guys should move to Los Angeles immediately. The Googles were presented to the worst party guests ever, the worst NFL General Manager ever, and the dumbest critique of Kim Kardashian ever.

Reese Waters returned to the show to talk about a very questionable medical study as well as a breakthrough for his beloved Redskins. We also revealed who's REALLY to blame for all of the phone thefts in NYC as well as Sarah Palin's 2008 candidacy. The Googles went heavy on PTSD, HBO, and Bracketology.

A group of scientists in Norway are aiming to treat alcoholism with LSD. Don't worry it made no sense to us either. GOP strategist Dave Finkelstein stopped by to tell us what's wrong with Sandra Fluke AND the movie game change. He even managed to draw a few corrections out of our "Standards and Practices" department.

After a night in which Andrew Breitbart and Sean Hannity subjected us to a Peanuts reenactment we turned to 20 year NYPD Veteran Eric Reynolds to make sense of that and other crimes. A suburban mom running a brothel and a math challenged radio host guest starred.

Eric Davidson, frontman of "The Newbomb Turks" and author of "We Never Learn" stopped by to talk about all things punk. From the insanely underrated Ohio scene of the late 80's to the Tokyo bands that created a musical version of Canal Street. We also got into being knocked out by a microphone, and a new genre of music called "Klanz-abilly". There was even a public service announcement about getting "Tricked by Jesus". The Googles focused on the horrible people who run the Indianapolis Colts, the cash hungry people who run Apple, and the DEFEAT hungry people who support Mitt Romney.

Jesse Adams, frontman of Me and The Fox, dropped into the world's biggest apology fest to talk about Tim Tebow on the Bachelor and double standards on Kirk Cameron. The Googles went out to Patricia Heaton for caving in, Rush Limbaugh for taking a punch, and INTOLERANT preachers of tolerance.

Lee Camp made his final U.S. Radio appearance before taking off on his tour of cities that sound like they were in the movie "Hot Shots". We talked about the one guy madder at Rush Limbaugh than ANY WOMAN, Car Pooling in Taxis, Leaked nude photos, and the truth about Super Tuesday. The Google awards were presented to phony corporate apologies, must win primary states, and Christina Hendrick's REAL breasts.

Mike Edison, Editor in Chief Of Screw Magazine, Publisher of High Times, stopped by to discuss his new book "Dirty! Dirty! Dirty!" as well as the fact that Hue Hefner is the Nickelback of Pornography. We also got into his world famous Bong Guitar, presidential politics, and the death of pubic hair. The Googles were presented to people seeking quiet train rides, a sheriff/birther, and of course, Rush Limbaugh for his latest attempt to boost ratings. Superstar guest producer Jordan Ferber sat in to maintain order, which is saying a lot about the type of show this was.

An embarrassment of riches ensued on the show today as we were joined by not one, but two comedy powerhouses. Zan Aufderheide took time out from her east coast swing to explain why I've been wrong on Danica Patrick all along and to explain who's thrilled with Snooki's pregnancy. But wait theres more. Pat Dixon, he of NYC Comedy Report fame, stopped by to talk drunk cops and school shootings. As family friendly shows go, this was one of our lesser ones!

Bill Marx, son of the great Harpo Marx, joined us to talk movie sequels and growing up Marx. We also learned about male stalkers and ways to kicked out of the toy department at a department store. Drunk cops also played a prominent role due to the fact that an NYPD cop get busted for drunk driving IN A COP CAR. The Googles were presented to sleepy Nascar drivers, morons at the NRA and THE GREATEST FUND RAISER OF ALL TIME.

On a day when Mitt Romney created more comedy for his opponents, Zack Handlen, author of "If You Like Monty Python" joined us for an inside look at all things related to Monty Python in modern pop culture, including the decline of the Simpsons, the limitations of Sacha Baron Cohen, and some grown up talk about why a lot of comedies don't age well. The Googles were presented to a rain soaked race, some honest acceptance speeches, and a terrible tragedy in Ohio.

Dean Imperial joined us to discuss the planet Kolob and other reasons why Mitt Romney won't win the election. We also got into a new report out of the Congressional Budget Office that disproves the entire Tea Party narrative. The Googles were presented to cheating search engine optimizers and drug cheats on the Milwaukee Brewers.

Alonso Duralde, star author and movie phone impersonator, joined us to talk Christmas Horror movies, Voter Horror Movies, and his new book "Have Yourself A Movie Little Christmas". The show began with a disturbing religious scandal for Mitt Romney and the Mormons involving none other than Anne Frank, THAT ANNE FRANK. The Googles were presented to The Enquirer, disappointing nude photos, and a scam in the weight loss industry.

Nick Cobb, star comic/ Super Bowl Commercial actor, joined us to weigh in on the LATEST sex scandal involving IMF head Dominique Strauss Khan. We also discussed why provocative VODKA ads work. Tonight's GOP primary was previewed and The Google's were presented to battered women who aren't afraid to sing a duet with their batterer as well as bold quarterbacks who dare criticize Tim Tebow on Ash Wednesday

Oscar Winner George Kennedy Stopped by to discuss hanging with OJ, getting hit by a pool cue by Frank Sinatra, and winning his Oscar starring alongside Paul Newman in "Cool Hand Luke". He also explained why he's rooting for George Clooney at the Oscars and why he watches "Casablanca" as much as he does. His New Book "Trust Me" is in stores everywhere and you should buy three copies minimum, if you like show biz and grown up talk. The Googles were presented to a Satan Fighting GOP contender, a steroid using outfielder, and an extremely promiscuous night in New Orleans.

With the Republican Party demanding a new candidate enter a race, and ESPN trying to downplay a race, we went heavy on LYING officials at a faltering nuclear reactor in Japan. Alyse Kenny joined us to promote her show benefitting "The Cure Is Now" on Monday 2/27 @ The Gotham Comedy Club and also cleared up some controversy over her last charity gig as well. The Googles were presented to the doomed nuptials of Elizabeth Smart, a clueless reality show host, and a missing in action ESPN executive. For tickets to Alyse Kenny's killer show call 212 367 900.

On a day when the world wasted its money, GOP Strategist Dave Finkelstein joined us to try and make sense of why ANYONE would throw money behind Newt Gingrich at this point. We were also joined in studio by societal analyst Dean Imperial who weighed in on drunk pilots, and the fact that the MTA is trying to SELL SUBWAY BENCHES. The Googles were presented to patriotic over eaters, and the firing of Pat Buchanan.

On a day when we clearly didn't have it, we were luckily joined by someone who did. Charlie Gaeta, playmaking comic and cultural observer, joined us to talk about the Hazards of quitting smoking, the hazards of being Mitt Romney, and the racist ways of the NY Knicks.

Dan Soder, Big Game Comic and the sporting equivalent of a crackhead's son, stopped by to talk Lin-Sanity, voices that don't match appearances, and comedy festivals that require abs. We also got into the fact that the Knicks resurgence bares a striking resemblance to a Michael J. Fox movie and that Floyd Mayweather is the last person on Earth that should be serving as a societal analyst on Twitter. The Googles were presented to a dog that was never on the roof of Mitt Romney's car, a super model on "Intervention", and a winning TEAM.

First Team All Pro Comic Jesse Joyce took us inside the writing strategy for some of the biggest Comedy Central roasts in history. Along the way he settled a violent dispute over a wether or not a guy can use a gift certificate on a date and explained why sports fans are all a tad insane. There was even a small helping of political analysis having to do with the fine art of Search Engine Optimization. The Googles were presented to a Fox News call to arms, as well as a protest against Mitt Romney that would make Clark Griswald proud.

Helen Hong phoned in from LA to bring us the truth about the Whitney Houston drama. She also explained how we'll know when Jeremy Lin has truly elevated the Asian community. The Googles were presented to a slighted Golf Champion as well as a slighted frontman of both The Beatles and Wings. A fight at an Indian Casino involving a NY State Senator resulted in both comedy and hard truth.

Eric Reynolds, 20 year NYPD Vet, joined us to discuss the fact that the New York Yankees are quickly becoming the Cincinnati Bengals. He also explained why MTA Bus drivers get more women than anyone, and broke down some racist police statistics. The Googles were presented to a disappointing FBI File, an androgynous fashion model, and a FIXED Political Vote.

GOP Strategist Dave Finkelstein stopped in to explain why Obama is going to lose and the voters already have. We also broke down Sean Hannity's foray into Howard Beale territory and the fact that it will eventually cost him his job. The Googles were presented to a feisty seven year old who escaped a kidnapping, a broke society, and a fired CNN Anchor who DID NOT get his money's worth on the offensive Tweets. We took time to explain the type of jokes worth getting fired for telling.

Mike Brown, Comic, Life Coach, and Crime Fighter stopped by to discuss Mitt Romney's electability and homeless reparations. He also explained how Jennifer Hudson is to blame for Karl Lagerfeld calling Adele fat. News coverage of a stolen blow up doll in Iowa drove our standards and practices department to the verge of quitting. The Googles were presented to the world's biggest fish and some LGBT communities who are guilty of having extremely poor judgement.

Ray Ellin, stand up champion, movie producer, and late night talk show sensation stopped by to talk extortion, murder suicide, and Todd Barry impersonations. Along the way we got into criminals who lack ambition and British rappers that DO NOT. The Googles were presented to an angry Brazilian woman, a bikini clad loser, and a really drunk country singer. NO, TIME SQUARE DID NOT WIN THE GOOGLES.

Stand up Heavyweight Mike Vecchione joined us from Atlantic City for a Super Bowl version of the morning after pill. Madonna, Gisele, and carpooling with a three time champion were all in play. The Googles focused on a great commercial for a lame product as well as the darkest story we'll cover this year that doesn't involve the history of the diamond on your engagement ring.

With a won loss record of 48-19 on the season, we had no choice but to put it all on the line and give out one last pick on the BIGGEST GAME OF THE YEAR. Zan Aufderheide joined us live from Super Bowl Village in Indianapolis to weigh in on local food, Madonna's new found sex appeal, and the similarities between Indy and NY.

On a day when we issued a Fatwa against some idiots who are circulating an anti police video, Lee Camp, star comic and "pampered" protester stopped by to talk about the Flag Burning by Occupy Wall Street as well as the CAMPAIGN Burning conducted by Mitt Romney yesterday. There was also a small helping of Soccer riot mixed in with some misguided ground hog hostility.

Dan Naturman, Letterman regular and Twitter phenomenon, joined us to discuss the Presidential edition of American Idol and the powerful effect that doing three Lettermans has on one's career. The Google's went heavy on a "fraudulent" move by a popular women's cancer charity. We also explained why the Florida primary, won by Romney, was a big letdown for both Romney and the GOP.

Jonathan Randall joined us in studio to discuss Danielle Radcliff's "Jim Carrey Phase" as well as the future of technology in the adult film business. We also touched on Death Hoaxes and the demise of Facebook. A 67 year old woman took the liberty to add a third collection at every mass she attended for seven years much to the delight of an Irish Gift Shop.

Pat Dixon joined us to recap the Nearly Naked Lady Hour and to sift through the wreckage of the Greg Kelly rape allegations. We also unveiled the latest anti Obama slur, which oddly enough resulted in yet another proud moment for Carnival Cruise Lines. Along the way we diagnosed the true problem facing our nation and called a few disingenuous NY news papers onto the carpet as well.

In this bare knuckle episode of the show Alyse Kenny joined us to discuss her benefit for "Rosie's Theater Kids" and also gave us a good idea of where the money is REALLY going. Carnival Cruise lines found yet another way to insult the survivors of the Italian Ship wreck and Ron Paul stole another GOP Debate in his inimitable Dennis Kucinich type way. The Googles focused on drunk game show hosts, and unenthusiastic obituary readers. Thanks for listening this week. Alyse Kenny's benefit is this Monday, January 30, 8pm, @ Gotham Comedy Club. For tickets visit www.gothamcomedyclub.com or call (212) 367 9000.

Freddie C, retired drug dealer who ran the streets from the age of 13, joined us to dish on what it's like to bribe cops, sell drugs in prison, and spend 23 hours a day in solitary confinement. Along the way he explained the two key things you NEED TO KNOW if you want to do drugs, sell drugs, or legalize drugs. The Google Awards focused on shameless book promotion, missing news anchors, and spelling errors on Wheel of Fortune. We also got into Demi Moore's inability to act her age.

Ted Alexandro phoned in from his bus tour with Craig Ferguson to talk about the lost art of being president in the internet age as well as a possible John Fisch candidacy in 2016. Along the way we unveiled a new Rasmussen Poll that pretty much forces Jeb Bush off the couch for the April 1 primaries. The Google Awards focused heavily on why the city of Detroit is giving fat men two hundred million dollars. A Facebook Poll almost ended the 2012 race for the White House 9 months early.

Reese Waters joined us to reveal who's really responsible for women having poor body issues in this country and to explain the fine art of picking up women in Indianapolis. We also located a group of protesters that need to get laid more than you do and played the greatest campaign commercials ever recorded during a game of "Fun With The Truth"

Carnival Cruise Lines has unveiled a whole new way to soak their customers and Warren Holstein stopped by to discuss it. He also weighed in on the moment of silence FOR Paterno as well as the moment of silence BY Paterno. The Google Awards featured a star quarterback, an ex star singer, and a petulant plane passenger that wasn't shilling for "Words With Friends" like Alec Baldwin.

On a day when Etta James passed the torch to our newest soul sensation, Barak Obama, we paused to take a look at the magic of Newt Gingrich. Entertainment insider Jonathan Randall stopped by to bring us up to speed on the weekend's big events, and we closed on giving out gambling advice on the BIGGEST EVENT, Giants/49ers.

Brian Koppelman, writer of "Rounders" and "Oceans Thirteen", phoned in to go toe to toe with our TRUTH SEEKING MISSILE of a host on all things to do with the firing of Letterman Comedy Booker Eddie Brill. Along the way we touched on the end of free speech, the end of the Knicks, and the beginning of Newt Gingrich's swingers club. Rick Perry is gone but according to a new book he is still ON TOP. The Google Awards culminated in an impassioned defense of Marky Mark and The Funky Bunch.

Comedy powerhouse and Fox News Contributor Barry Weintraub joined us to weigh in on the the new law threatening to ruin the porn industry, the GOP Race, and the truth behind cowardly ship captains. A Facebook poll centered on wether or not the government should regulate the way you have sex in your home and the google awards explained the difference between celebrity illness and civilian illness.

Will Butler, 13 year military veteran, joined us to weigh in on the biggest controversy facing our military since Cher filmed the video on the air craft carrier. Facebook unveiled an APP that allows users to record a status update that will be posted when they die. Listener comments ranged from excited to dead. The google awards focused on Betty White's attempt to revive Jaime Kennedy's career and the reason Wikipedia will suddenly become reliable for 24 hours.

Standout Comic Jonathan Randall joined us to preview this weekends goings on in entertainment and to weigh in on the extremely sensitive topic of whether or not Mattel should make a bald, cancer stricken Barbie doll for sick kids. Somehow we handled this without getting fired. With a won lost record of 44-18, we had no choice but to throw in some gambling advice for this weekends NFL Divisional Playoff Round that probably pissed off more people than the cancer thing.

Jeff Caldwell, Star of the Late Show with David Letterman, joined us to talk corpse desecration, covert killings, and other "Fun for the whole family" subjects. He also revealed a fool proof strategy for betting the NFL playoffs and told us why Newt Gingrich will be joining Occupy Wall Street at the end of the month. A new installment of "What We're Fighting For" was dedicated to our troops on a day when the quest for the ultimate viral video landed some of them in hot water.

Helen Hong, star comic on the move, joined us to discuss the latest pizza from Papa John's "The Lady Chinky Eyes". Along the way we got into why suicide is as popular as it is in Asia and what it's like to be racially profiled. A special "Water Board Wednesday" discussion led to some harsh words for the Mayor and some REAL PROTESTERS explained why your child's xbox 360 isn't the source of goodwill that you think it is.

Ray Ellin, big game comic, talk show host, and dear friend of Kate Moss' handlers stopped by to dish on GOP sex attire and roving door men. You're not going to believe this but apparently there are that manipulate political polls and on this day we explained how they do it and why you the listener unwittingly fall prey to such shenanigans. OUR daily poll revolved around the EXPLOITATIVE ways of"The Honey Badger's" overlords and there were no sleight of hand tricks necessary.

Pat Dixon, All Pro Comic turned WORLD CLASS Show Producer, stopped by to explain the upside of people getting killed in NYC elevators and to weigh in on the "Halloween Crisis" facing the White House. Go to his show at the Creek and the Cave on January 28 and buy his CD "Goodbye Forever Fatty" EVERYWHERE CD'S ARE SOLD. "Will it Work" took to the high seas to avoid lousy in laws and the Google Awards started off at Jay Z and ended with Tebow haters writing a different ending to the karate kid.

In this episode "The World's Translator" explained why a girl who shot down a marriage proposal should become a new standard bearer for women everywhere. We also figured out who Mitt Romney would be if cast in a Romantic Comedy and gave away some life changing gambling advice.

We buried the time capsule marked "2011-1 Year Left" by awarding our "Person of The Year" and by counting down the five most googled stories of the year. Along the way we revealed the genius of the Mexican board of tourism and Senior Political Correspondent Ken Wood joined us to reveal his "Person of The Year" . Shockingly, it WAS NOT the Israel Dead Sea Salt Salesman that accosted him at the mall.

Societal Analyst Dean Imperial stopped by for the last round of "Blame That Tune" in 2011. Jimmy explained what this Christmas has in common with The Godfather. Gambling advice was given out, life coaching took place, and Old Navy went into full fledged casino mode. Happy Holidays!

On a day when the world's 5th largest military was handed to a twenty eight year old and a million people on twitter confused Lil Kim with a Korean Dictator it was the New York Knicks that did the dumbest thing in the world. Now that the last of the U.S. troops has exited Iraq we engaged in a healthy debate over what constitutes being "too self congratulatory". Ask a Cabbie attempted to get Jim fired while also discussing the creative book keeping of the Bloomberg administration.

Lee Camp took time out from pile driving Sharon Angle to weigh in on a monstrous PR faux paus by the President that has political advisers everywhere recalling the days of Dubya. Gary Busey made a huge announcement to those coveting the key crack house swing vote. A baseball commissioner gets hit by an egg just as he finishes wiping egg off his face. A radio host answers calls and emails with the deft touch that only a community college graduate can deliver. The Google awards go straight to crazy cat ladies and the art of defrauding them. Good luck with this one.

Peyton Clarkson and Heather Ann Moody Clarkson stopped in to find out wether or not they should bread. The results will shock you. We also explained why The Wiggles are now featured on XXX Web Sites and of course, we gave out some life changing gambling advice. Oh yeah, and some punk on NY 1 tried to divide races by creatively explaining a confrontation between cops and kids in Staten Island. Lastly, we turned a corner in society and saved the word.

Senior Political Correspondent Ken Wood checked in to explain why Obama is Tebowing in the White House. Ask a Cabbie pissed off a bunch of iphone using pro choicers. Childhood innocence was restored by a wayward parent looking for a do-over. Listen @ your own risk.

On the day Herman Cain's campaign imploded for good, we revealed his TRUE ACHILLES HEEL. Along the way we put up a Facebook Poll that caused a riot and played a round of Ask a Cabbie that went heavy on dysfunctional seniors and sports betting. We also revealed why The Republican Presidential Debates are now going to begin with the song "Girls, Girls, Girls."

This Thursday is make or break for millions of couples who will be meeting the family for the first time. Seeing as most of them will fail, we have offered up the ultimate way to make dating PERFECT for everyone. For real. We also conducted a poll to see who YOU would WATER BOARD if you could. Blame That Tune focused on the Best 80's songs to commit a crime while listening to. Special thanks to the Pointer Sisters for that one. See ya in Philly.

With the Holidays approaching we were forced to help a pilot on a discount airline extract himself from the cockpit lavatory in order to avert a terror scare. Eric Reynolds, 20 year NYPD vet, stopped by to talk Occupation myths, political sex scandals, and the proper way to handle Jerry Sandusky. "Ask a Cabbie" stooped to an all new low from a morality standpoint, which is saying A LOT.

Will Janowitz, a four season veteran of "The Sopranos", sat down to discuss Scorcese on a budget, Ideal Commercial Flying Scenarios, celebrity coat check letdowns, and the horrible waiting room etiquette on our show. Along the way we played a round of "Ask a Cabbie" that compared the Penn State situation favorably to that of the Mets and we played a round of "Will it Work" that compared the Hindenberg favorably to a marriage that took place in lower Manhattan yesterday.

Societal Analyst Dean Imperial sat down with America's Favorite Cab Driver to discuss the beginnings of Herman Cain, the end of Rick Perry, and the dangers of liking football too much. Along the way we examined the "Stupidest Things Anyone Ever Did in College" and narrowed down the Presidential vernacular to one unspeakable word. Top it all of with a game of "Blame That Tune" devoted to Campaign Crushing Scandals and you've got yourself a winner.

Lee Camp dodged enemy fire to form a radio voltron of sorts with Big Game James. Topics included fun facts about non profits, curious wrestling moves, and the one job Jimmy could get at Occupy Wall Street. An extremely hostile episode of "Will It Work" focused on a couple being set up to fail by the Daily News. We also played an accusatory round of "Ask a Cabbie". What else would you expect on the ugliest News Day of the year?

With Herman Cain taking on water and Rick Perry taking on MUSHROOMS, we opened up the mail bag for a politically charged round of "Ask a Cabbie". Along the way we dove headfirst into what it is your spouse/domestic partner/roommate does that makes you want to kill them and we dove into the three most heavily searched google topics of the day, and addressed the true meaning of turning 34.